It really is what is it....I guess?.....

My war with Mr. Flu.....


Over the past few days I have been conquered by the notorious flu. I am planning my escape plan and it has been working so far. I have more energy today and that's great. **Throws in Eric Roberson CD** "She couldn't hear me over the music, She didn't really hear my song," is what he says in the song. When someone is sick or not feeling well, I'm always the supportive one to come running to see if everything is alright. When I'm sick, where they go,where they go? A reason may be that I have always been the type to be independent and take care of myself since I'm used to it. Or....the people that I want to check up on me don't! You can't make anyone be concerned about you. The world doesn't realize the effect that I have on it sometimes, but the world doesn't care along with some people as well. So I blame myself in a way. No problem. It has been a tough week for me, but the weekend is here and maybe I can finish it on a good note. The medicine has been taking its toll on me, being drugged up is very wild. I can't really sing but I have a song, but the people I want to hear it, they do NOT hear it. So do I sing louder or write another one? I'll leave that open. "You're going down Mr.Flu!"


The Marble Effect....


If anybody who has read a previous post about putting all marbles in one basket, this is an extension of that. I have to honestly admit, right now, that I put my marbles all in one basket. I kinda pampered around it in the previous post, but this is what the blog is for. So I have to express here. I go through the days now wondering if the decisions that I have made or routes I have taken since the new year are worth it, and was the things I did or what I feel was a waste of time. Did I put something out there that I knew I wasn't going to get back? Can't put the blame on no one but myself for putting myself in this situation. Or maybe I am just overreacting as I do sometimes? Let's see.... I have thrown all marbles into one girl. I did not want this to happen but I knew it would. If someone has almost everything that you are looking for a woman, I'm pretty sure that you would do the same thing too. It seems like though this is affecting me more than it is affecting her. Or I'm just overreacting? She is single currently, and she is really enjoying it as we speak, which is good, but what happens when someone comes along and catches her attention? Due to certain circumstances, there is nothing I can do. *sarcastic laughter* When you don't receive as many text messages or as many phone calls as before, you get to wonder things like this, but hey it's all natural here. So when I was turning down all those dates last month, I thought I was convinced on several things, but now it makes it look like that I was a total jackass for doing that. So feel free to criticize me about that, I may deserve it. I was only following my heart. That seems kinda mushy but something I usually don't do. You get the feeling that when you find that special one, that you can all the things that you imagine doing with her like picnics in the park, breakfast in bed, chilling @ the arcade, walks by the lake, to the little things like movie night @ home, play entertaining board games, holding long conversations that make you want to talk and stay up all night, although there is always something that ALWAYS prevent this from happening. It NEVER fails. The woman could be married, or strongly committed, or she could be long distance, or certain things like her feelings about religion may interfere. Whatever the case may be, there is always something that stop your expectations of happiness with her. I have gotten around that but I don't know how much longer I can do that. You think to yourself, will somebody take the place that I want to have with that woman, and treat her bad? I would feel bad because I know that she deserves better or maybe I won't because that was her decision and that was her loss. That has happen a lot. Or maybe I overreacting? So what do I do? Do I keep my marbles in the one basket? Or...Do I start to separate them? A lot of people tell me, including one friend recently "You should separate them! That girl you like is not going to come around. She is somewhere else doing her own thang. If she meets someone, you will not come to her mind, and if the guy plays his cards right, then you need to fold them. *kinda weird that my friend put poker in here somehow and she doesn't play,lol* She is never going to be near you and there is no indication that you two will be together." My friend also went on to say,"J, you need to stop acting like a pussy, and explore your options. You pass up too many opportunities for someone who is not going to commit to you anytime soon." I started to go off on my friend but I hesitated.....to responding to my friend. Was she right? Is she trying to awake me from the deep slumber, the deep dream that I'm in....of being with that special one? I just told my friend that whatever happens, I will always be her friend and that I will be there for her no matter what! If she needs anything, I will make sure she gets it. Regardless of whatever relationship we have, even if the status of it is not what I want it to be, I will always be a phone call away. My friend says, "Whatever!!!" *couldn't help but to think about the lady at K-mart that day*


Tourney Update....


The madness has begun.... I am currently 1 point behind the co-leaders. There were 16 games yesterday and each was 1 point. I got 13 out of a possible 16. I got the upset of #12 UWisconsin-Milwaukee over #5 Alabama. The Illini received a scare but as expected pulled away in the second half. There are right people in the pool, with everybody having the Illini winning it all with the exception of you know who, ME!! I have North Carolina. Go Tar Heels!!! My favorite team, Arizona, won as well. They could reach the Final Four if they play some defense. The first weekend is always the important one, you want to stay close and make sure that your Final Four picks make it to the next weekend. My friend said that #2 Wake Forest was going to get clipped, his choice in that region, #4 Louisville, little that he knows that his team will get clipped, but that's what the madness is all about. I just wish this was the only madness that I had!


Drink of the Day....


Mojito....

1 1/2 oz. light Rum
1/2 oz. simple syrup
1/2 oz. lime syrup
3 mint leaves
Soda water
You can use a rocks glass or an old fashion glass
Muddle mint leaves and syrup with a muddler
Add ice, lime juice and rum
Fill with Soda
If desired, you can garnish with mint leaves


-Da Original 1-